And so yesterday I attacked a pile of pile of final portfolios from a creative writing class that closed up some four years ago. And written on the back of a folder was the following message:
Hi, Dr. White
I had a crazy weekend for my birthday! At the pool party I got drunk, beat the shit out of my man-friend, then got dropped on my head/face, and went to the ER. What a birthday huh? I also had a relative die Saturday :( I thought you would enjoy my little anecdote :)
Have a great summer!
FN
Notice that FN is not making an appeal to my sympathy. Nor is she using her “little anecdote” as an excuse—in fact, her portfolio, and all of her work in that class, was turned in on time. She is just an energetic kid enjoying her youth—though no doubt applying her energy in inappropriate and nonproductive ways.
Note to current and future students: don’t do this at home!